Marshmallows and Irony
by jacki
Summary: *Chapters 5&6 now up!* At a roof-top camp out with his friends, 15-year-old Arnold is dared to kiss Helga within a week. Will it all turn out as planned?? Or will something MORE happen?? *TEENAGE-esque drama!*
1. I Dare You

DISCLAIMER:

I don't own _Hey Arnold!. _But I will when my 14th birthday rolls around. Hehe, I wish. Well anyway, it's not mine, I'm just writing this story to fanaticize what might happen to the characters in my favorite cartoon of all time. [cough] besides SpongeBob [cough]

A/N:

This is my first fanfic in a _long _time. I know this is probably really cheesy and cliché. In addition to the fact that it is yet another Arnold/Helga fanfic. But their chemistry is just so real, and sweet, and loveable!!! It's just something you can't help but write about! The storyline also vaguely resembles the movie _She's All That_. I said _vaguely_… do I have to write another disclaimer for _vaguely???_ _No? _Okay then- to the story, Poncho!

Wait- okay, the kids are High School Freshmen (15-year-olds), just so you don't forget. =D

Marshmallows and Irony

Chapter One: I Dare You

It was about ten o'clock at night on Saturday. Arnold had invited about ten friends to his house for a roof top camp out. The boys sat in a circle, anxiously awaiting Gerald's dare for Arnold. Arnold, the poor, dense fool, had chosen 'dare' instead of 'truth', which everyone knows is the easier option, due to the fact that lying is the sub option.

"Arnold, I dare you to…" Gerald was at a loss of brilliance this time. He had so far successfully dared Sid to lick Arnold's toilet bowl; Harold to kiss Abner; and Stinky to confess love to a random girl through the means of a telephone. He was known for his cruel dares, but since Arnold was his best friend, he decided to let him off fairly easy. "kiss some girl."

"Who?" Arnold asked. He hoped this wouldn't have to be too unbearable.

"Umm… I don't exactly know quite yet."

"C'mon! Pick some ugly girl already!" yelled Curly, picking his nose.

"No, wait, it has to be more complicated than that." Sid said.

"Where are you going with that, Sid?" said Gerald reluctantly. He hated the fact that someone was trying to infringe on his dare, much less a guy that had just licked a toilet.

"I mean, why don't we let him pick someone out of a yearbook?" explained Sid.

"Yeah!" Harold butted in. "And he can have a blindfold! And spin around 5 times! and pin the tail on the donkey!"

"I like it." said Gerald coolly. "Minus the donkey part, of course."

"What do mean!??!!? That's the best part!"

"Harold." Arnold said flatly.

"Yeah?"

"Just shut up." The discussion ended there.

So the boys gathered in Arnold's room and searched for his 8th grade yearbook. It was Arnold who stood on the chair near his bookshelf and looked for it. He had so very many of them; all the way from his yearbook from Kindergarten year. He thought back to the day when his class received them last year. As always, his signature was wanted in most everyone's book, but there was one person's request for a signature that had puzzled him. Helga had asked him to sign hers, in a fairly nice tone. He had always asked Helga to sign his book first, it was rarely vice versa. They were friends in his point of view- very distant, but nonetheless understood, friends. Arnold had always dreamt it to turn out as more than that. He had always dreamt of knowing Helga in a much different light.

(Woo…Flashback!)

__

"Hey Arnold!" said Helga as she approached him in the desk filled classroom. 

"Yeah, Helga? What's up?" 

"I know you usually ask me first, and I usually refuse to, and then we get into this uncomfortable conversation and…"

"Helga, what do you want?"

"Would you sign my yearbook?"

Arnold looked at her strangely for a moment. He couldn't believe that she wasn't calling him Football Head, much less even yelling at him. She noticed this and responded to it.

"What's the matter, Football Head? Are you going to sign it or not?"

There it was, the harshness. She had returned to normal. He relaxed a bit.

"Yeah, sure, I'll sign it."

They exchanged books and signed each others'. Their moment then, had stopped, and things returned to normal.

Arnold remembered what he had written. '_Helga, I hope that we keep talking to each other every so often. It would be nice to get to know the real you. Maybe we could hang out sometime. Who knows?' _He had then left his number and signed his name. He also remembered what Helga had written in his. He wondered if she remembered too. 

__

'Arnold. A poem by Helga.

I don't understand you,

But here we are, friends.

Hope we meet over the summer,

But who knows when it ends?

Those two long months away

From my school mate.

You could get to know me,

But it seems a little late.

Maybe we could_ hang out… sometime._

~Helga G. Patacki 555-555-5555'* (Corrected)

She was so eloquent with words. That's one of the things that made Arnold think of Helga so intriguingly. She was mysterious enough, and yet was so honest. She wrote wonderful poetry, but he wondered what she meant by most of it. There had to be an underlying meaning that he couldn't perceive.

"Arnold! Would you grab the yearbook already?" Gerald said, a little agitated.

"Yeah, I'm starving' down here!" griped Harold, rubbing his grumbling stomach.

"Oh, sorry." said Arnold sheepishly. He hadn't realized that he was almost day dreaming. He quickly found the book and stepped down from the chair. "Here it is…" He handed it to Gerald.

"…the book." said Gerald, eying it as it laid in his hands. Like some ancient, priceless relic, he held it, dreaming of the endless possibilities of _victims _that Arnold might happen to choose_._

"So how are we going to do this?" Arnold asked, suspicious of what might happen next. Before he knew it, Sid had slipped a blindfold over his face, at first catching on his nose, pulling his schnoz to his face. This problem was quickly corrected after Sid had laughed about his mistake for a while, and pretty soon all Arnold could see was darkness.

"First, there will be a blindfold placed over your eyes, my brother, as Sid has already done." Everyone except Arnold laughed a bit after Gerald said this. "Second, we'll ask you what pair of pages of our grade's class you would like to choose the random girl from. Third, you will be spun around in the chair 5 times, and _then_, you'll have to choose the girl on the page, using only your finger to decide with."

"And no peeking!" yelled Sid in his ear.

"So what will it be?" Gerald asked. "What set of pages would you like to choose?"

"The third." said Arnold, secretly hoping he had chosen the page containing the girl that he wished to pick.

Harold then began to spin Arnold around in the chair, rather quickly, and all of the other boys began to spin him too. Arnold counted the spins; their were six, not five. It was probably a mistake of Harold's; he could never count very well. 

"Okay, Arnold, pick your mystery dream girl." Gerald said, almost as anxious as Arnold.

Arnold's finger browsed aimlessly across the pages. He had no idea what last names it grazed over. The result was killing him, he didn't know if he could take it. But all of that didn't matter, Arnold was trying to overcome the dizziness so he could pick the girl that he had been waiting so long to kiss, so long to love. He longed to choose…

"Brainy?!?!!" exclaimed everyone standing behind him.

"He can't go out with a boy!!" gagged Curly. "_Or can he?…"_

"Just pick again, Rico." Gerald said, annoyed with the result.

Arnold's finger scrolled the pages once again, praying for a miracle, praying not to pick a vamp. So finally, his finger stopped. There was quite a long pause. He didn't understand it; who had he picked? He took off his blindfold and gazed upon the picture that his finger had been placed upon. He then understood the silence. All he could do was sit and gawk. The bet was then made, the dare was set in stone.

"Helga Patacki." Arnold stared with empty eyes at the name. And for all that he had hoped for, all that he had wished… he had chosen her, blindly, instead of his beloved and coveted Lila.

"Well, you've got your work cut out for you, man." said Gerald, half laughing, half staring in disbelief. Conversations then commenced after that, but Arnold was silent.

A/N: Well, that was the first chapter. Kinda obvious who he would pick, right? Hope you liked it so far- review if you wanna.

*I made up that poem on a whim. And that number- I just pulled it out of the sky. So don't be calling it and pranking on some old man in New Jersey… or Spain… or something. (Corrected it!)


	2. Discoveries

Disclaimer on first chapter!

A/N: I had a little inspiration last night. * A little * So hopefully this chapter will be pretty good. I'm uploading the first two chapters at the same time so I don't end up ditching on my story all together. Well, have a nice day, and read my story…

Marshmallows and Irony

Chapter Two: Discoveries

It was the day after Arnold's camp out, and all he could think about was Helga. He laid on his bed, just thinking. How could he kiss her? How could he make her except him? This situation some how went beyond just a dare. Helga wasn't just some average girl who would except anyone's affections, however fake they might be, she wanted more than that; he could tell. He finally decided he would ask her to hang out at his house, and let things progress from there. The phone suddenly rang, while Arnold was amidst thought. He didn't answer it, but heard his grandpa yell from downstairs.

"Arnold! It's for you!" Grandpa yelled. "It's Gerald!"

Arnold picked up the receiver in his room which was placed right beside his bed. He knew what this call was about.

"Hey Gerald," said Arnold, a little bored sounding.

"Hey Arnold," Gerald responded. "So, what's your plan of action?"

"What do you mean?" 

"C'mon, man, you know what I mean. The dare. Helga. You have to kiss her. Remember, Romeo?"

"Gerald, do I really have to do this?"

"Of course you do! You were dared, and in some states that's legally binding."

"So all I have to do is…"

"One kiss. Just one kiss. Our cameras will be watching."

"Cameras? C'mon, Gerald… _why?"_

"Well you will never really _finish _the dare until we _see_ you finish the dare. So the cameras stay."

"Fine, Gerald. I'll talk to you later then."

"Wait a minute, Arnold. You have to do it by _Sunday_, which gives you a whole week for it to happen."

"Right. Well, see you, Gerald. _Later."_

"Okay, bye man."

Arnold hung up the phone and just laid on his bed, staring at the sky. He stayed that way for maybe thirty minutes, until he decided that he had to call Helga… _now_. He had to get a good start on things. So he picked up the receiver and dialed her number; the phone began to ring.

"Hello?" It was Helga who answered.

"Hey. Hi! Um, I mean _Hello_." Arnold said, failing at his attempted casualness.

"_Arnold? _Is that you, Football Head?"

"Yeah, it's me, Helga. _Hi."_

"_Right. _Well, what do you want, Arnoldo?"

"Oh, nothing… I just wanted to call you."

"_Really…"_

"Yeah, to see if you wanted to… um… hang out! _Uh, _At my place. Yeah, to hang out at my place!"

"Today?"

"Yeah, today."

"Well, I don't know, Football Head, I _am_ pretty busy. But I guess I could check my schedule. Just a minute."

"_Okay."_

Helga took the phone from her ear and covered the receiver with her hand. She grabbed her ever existent Arnold locket from her shirt and danced around in the hallway.

"_Oh Arnold!" _she gasped. "I have waited so long for you to ask me for friendship, to ask me to come over, to ask me to _hang out _with you. And now you are. Oh how long I have desired this moment, this moment when we will finally spend free time together. And now my wish has come true! _Oh, Arnold! My love!"_

All this time that Helga had been talking to herself, she was also wrapping herself up in the telephone cord, and suddenly toppled over onto the ground. Arnold heard the crash through the phone. (Luckily, he didn't hear Helga speaking _previous_ to the crash.)

"_Helga? _Helga, are you there? Are you okay?" asked a concerned Arnold.

A dazed and happy Helga finally realized she had fallen on the floor in the midst of her Arnold day dream. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Sounds great. Is three o'clock okay?" 

"Yeah, perfect. See you then."

Arnold hung up, satisfied that she had accepted, and Helga just kept her ear by the phone, savoring the last bit of Arnold's voice that still lingered in the receiver. What a loon… She looked up at the clock and noticed that it was already 2:30. 

"Shit! I've got to get ready!" she exclaimed. She raced up the stairs to take a shower. She then blow dried her hair and dressed in her usual outfit: pink, pink, pink. But after Arnold, Gerald, and she had saved the neighborhood and such, she had long since decided to always wear her hair down and not in pigtails. Because like Rhonda had told her before, _'Pigtails wear sooo campy.' _She ran downstairs now, at 2:55, and grabbed her skateboard to ride over to Arnold's. She wasn't very good, however, and frequently got snagged on cracks on the sidewalk. 

Arnold waited anxiously for her arrival. What would he say? What would they talk about? Where would the kiss come in? He thought it was best just to see how things would turn out by themselves. Maybe he would ask her out on a date. After all, he _did_ have a _whole_ week to complete the dare.

Arnold heard the doorbell ring and raced downstairs. But apparently, he didn't run fast enough because his grandpa got there before him. Grandpa answered the door with Arnold standing behind him. Helga stood outside the threshold on Arnold's stoop.

"Hi, I'm here to see Arnold." she said politely, for a change.

"Oh, sorry, we don't want to buy cookies now." Grandpa started. "Another Camp Fire Lass already stopped-" 

Arnold butted in, "No Grandpa, she's not a Camp Fire Lass." Then he led Helga through the door and up the stairs to his room. Grandpa just stood there for a moment, a little befuddled. 

As they walked through the hallway towards Arnold's stairs, Arnold started to talk to Helga, apologizing for his crazy Grandpa. Helga heard none of this, she was just simply delighted that she was in Arnold's house _with_ Arnold. _Not_ sneaking in, _not _unwelcome, but a _guest_. In Arnold's house, no, Arnold's _room_. This was the single greatest moment in her life so far. She couldn't believe what was actually happening.

"Y'know what I mean?" asked Arnold.

"Huh?" Helga came back to reality. She hadn't even heard what he was asking.

"Crazy, embarrassing parents." he repeated. "Do you know what I'm talking about?"

"Yeah, sure. Me too." 

__

'What's up with her?' Arnold thought. '_I wonder why she's so spaced out.'_

He pulled down his stairs and they walked up them, into his post-industrial bat cave, bachelor pad.

"Whoa, cool room." Helga said. "I love the ceiling. It's awesome, Footba- I mean, Arnold."

"Thanks, Helga. I love to look at the stars at night from my bed. Do you ever look at the stars, Helga?"

"Well, sure, they're there… I mean, you can't miss them. But they're just stupid stars." '_I love to look up at the moon and stars. _Helga thought. _Why am I still shutting myself off from Arnold?'_

__

'Why can't she be herself?' Arnold wondered. '_Why is she still shutting herself off from me?'_

Helga sat down on Arnold's bed, Arnold sat beside her. She just looked around his room in a silent awe. She then looked over to Arnold and their eyes met then; the whole world stopped. Arnold felt like kissing her right there, right then. But he knew he couldn't. It wouldn't be right. But maybe, just maybe, he could… Maybe he should… Maybe he would… He leaned in a little bit and then…

"So you're having a staring contest, are you?" Grandpa came busting through the door carrying a tray with milk and cookies on it. "I brought you kids a snack, just in case you were hungry."

"Thanks Grandpa." said Arnold reluctantly, but thankfully. The moment had been wrecked, it would probably never come again that afternoon. He wondered what Helga was thinking then.

'OhmyGod! _He was almost kissed me! He was going to, I _swear_ he was!' _Helga thought. She was utterly shocked, but tried to remain cool. '_Stupid Arnold's grandpa! He came at _precisely_ the wrong moment!'_

They had their milk and cookies, and Helga laid down on Arnold's bed. But both of them just sat in silence. They were still thinking about the kiss that _almost_ happened back there, both of them wondering what it would've been like. Even Arnold secretly wished that he _had_ kissed Helga, that he had felt her lips against his, and that that kiss might've unlocked some hidden love that he may harbor for Helga. It wasn't about the dare anymore, he wanted to get to know her better for _real_. He wanted to discover the side of her that only her best friend could possibly see.

"I better go, Football Head." Helga said. She felt very uncomfortable at this point.

"No, Helga, stay. Please." Arnold said, he almost sounded like he was begging. '_Why am I doing this?' _Arnold asked himself. '_What's wrong with me?'_

"Why?" she asked.

"What do you mean 'Why'?" 

"Look, Arnold, I think we both know what happened on your bed. Or, more to the point, _didn't_ happen." After she said this, Helga just looked at Arnold, there was a distant pain in her eyes. Arnold gazed back, there was comfort in his.

"Do you remember when you told me you loved me?" Arnold asked, still gazing.

"What do you mean, Arnoldo?" Helga turned her back, she was practically crying.

"You know, on Future Tech's roof top. When the neighborhood was going to be demolished by that Scheck guy?" (Yes, I corrected it. I AM a cheese ball.)

"Yeah, I didn't know if you still remembered." She bit her bottom lip.

"Of course I do. How dense do you think I am?" 

__

'I'm not going to answer that.' Helga thought.

"You don't have to answer that." Arnold said, embarrassed. He walked over to Helga and wiped a few tears away. "Let's get you a tissue."

The afternoon went on as such. They both shared embarrassing childhood memories and secrets, they began to confide in each other. It was now seven and Helga said she had to get home. They stood on his stoop together, but Arnold had to stall her just a _little_ bit longer…

"So, listen, Helga… I had a pretty nice time today. Y'know, just talking to you and stuff." said Arnold, he now started to get the chills that Helga had always gotten around him.

"Yeah, me too, Arnold. I guess you can be pretty okay, for a football head that is, of course." Helga still had to keep slightly mean. She didn't want to ruin her rep.

"And, well, I was wondering… Do you think you'd want to maybe, um…"

"Go out with you sometime?" Helga hoped that was what he was about to say, or else she had just looked like a total ass.

Arnold laughed slightly, part of his nervousness had vanished. "Yeah, that's it. Thanks, I didn't know if it would come out right." Arnold looked for her response, but all he saw was a subtle smile on Helga's sweet, sensible face. He knew that now was the time to try that kiss again, without a doubt. 

Helga saw the love in his eyes, the love that she had so long waited to see in them. Their feelings were now mutual, and she melted under his lips. They held each other close, never wanting that one, sweet kiss to end. Arnold knew that he wouldn't have wanted to pick anyone else out of that yearbook for the dare. Not even Lila. How lucky he was to pick the right girl so ironically.

__

'I can't believe this is happening!' Helga thought, absolutely excited. She was completely ecstatic at this moment. '_With Arnold in my arms, I have all I've ever wanted.'_

__

'Why am I kissing Helga? This cannot be happening.' Arnold thought. Although it was hard for him to admit it to himself, he was almost possibly more excited than Helga. '_Wow, she is a good kisser. What is this? The third or fourth time we've kissed? And this time, it's actually for real, for love. Am I in love with her? Could I possibly be in love with Helga G. Patacki?'_

They finally let go of the kiss, both of them breathless. They still held each other tight, gazing into each other's eyes.

"Wow." Arnold said, smiling very widely. "So is that a 'Yes'?"

"No, Arnold, it's a no. I just shared probably the most excellent kiss of my life with you for nothing. Of course it's a yes, Football Head!" Helga couldn't help but smile just as wide as Arnold.

Arnold stroked Helga's cheek with his hand. It was so perfect, so smooth. She had the most beautiful skin he had ever seen. He felt her hair with the other; it was silky, smooth, and flawless as well. To Helga's surprise, he kissed her again, possibly more passionately than before. Helga gave in to him and kissed back. It was a slow, sloppy kiss, fueled by lust, but strengthened by love. They broke apart once more and just stood there again, staring at each other, wondering what had just happened today.

"Whoa, now this is getting a little too crazy for me, Arnold." Helga said. The confusion was getting the best of her.

"I feel the same way, Helga, I mean one week we're barely talking to each other, and the next…" Arnold trailed off.

"What? And the next… what?"

"I think," Arnold said with a slightly unsure certainty. "I love you."

A/N: Oh no! *GASP!* What will happen next? Hope you liked the second chapter! Review if you want to! Read on!


	3. Pinch Me I'm Dreaming

Disclaimer on first chapter…

A/N: I appreciate all of the reviews and criticisms… No, I didn't see the movie -yet. I knew about the "555" thing… I just figured it was kinda dumb, though. So I got the roofs confused… so what? And yes, I admit it, the people were a little OOC; the story was rushed a little bit… but hold on a second! I'm going to pull out an old, cheesy trick! So watch out! Hehe… thanks for reading so far! (I corrected stuff in past chapters, I am the stupidest!!, okay?)

Marshmallows and Irony

Chapter Three: Pinch Me- I'm Dreaming

"Helga! Helga! _Are you awake??" _Arnold asked, shaking Helga as she laid on his bed.

"_Oh Arnold… Oh Arnold, my looo…." _Helga suddenly snapped out of her afternoon nap. "I mean, what are you doing, Football Head? Are you trying to scare me to death or something??"

"Sorry, Helga." Arnold apologized. "But you've been asleep ever since you finished your milk and cookies. It's already 6:30!" 

"Oh, well I guess milk always did make me sleepy."

"Do you still want to stay here, or go home, or what?"

"Could I stay at your place a little longer, Arnold? It's not because I like you or anything, of course. I just don't want ride home on my skateboard while I'm half-asleep and get run over by the Jolly Olly Man, or something."

Arnold laughed a little at this, Helga was still stand-offish. He just didn't understand her sometimes.

"Sure, Helga, I don't care. You can stay as long as you want to." 

While Helga was sleeping on his bed, Arnold couldn't help but think over what had happened with her; the almost-kiss. How could he make it happen for real? How could he complete Gerald's dare? He knew he couldn't deny the validity of the bet; if he didn't do it, he would be branded for life as a wimp, a chicken. But what if he did do it? The whole thing would be caught on tape, and probably sold out to the entire school; Helga would never forgive him… not in a million years. 

'Dammit!' Arnold thought. 'Why do I always have to be the sensitive, nice one??? It's like a curse!' Arnold had decided. He couldn't hurt Helga's feelings like that. Even if she was always mean to him. He could only kiss her if he really liked her enough to do that. He was utterly disgusted about that probability at the time being. (But who knows?? Things change, don't they? Well, they SHOULD!!)

Helga felt dazed and confused. Her dream had seemed so real. And now she had to succumb to the prison that was reality, the reality that was the Arnold who did not love or like her, like her.

"So Helga, what do you want to do now?" Arnold asked, trying not to sound as bored as he really was.

"Oh, I don't know Arnold, what do YOU like to do when you're mildly bored on a Sunday evening? Hmm?" Helga sounded a little sarcastic, she was still kind of bent out of shape by her all-to-real dream.

"Helga, I'm bored too, okay?" Arnold had to come up with something, he was starting to think that he should try to complete the dare, just to spite all the spit balls that had been thrown at his head so many times before. "I was thinking, maybe we should forget all of our differences and make a… fresh start."

"Fresh start?" Helga's left eye squinted, and her right eyebrow raised. "Listen, Arnoldo, I don't know who you think you're talking to, but Helga G. Patacki doesn't do… 'fresh starts.'"

At this, Arnold couldn't help but explode at Helga. "There it is!!" he yelled.

"What?"

"That stupid anger of yours! Why do you always do that?!!?!"

"What do mean, Football Head?"

"You know what I mean, Helga! Why can't you just be yourself??!? I know you're not always this angry and mad!"

"Arnold, you don't understand me at all." Helga looked at him; honesty, pain, and fear… all in her eyes. A lone tear trickled down her cheek.

"I'm sorry, Helga." Arnold said. He truly was sorry for making her cry. Maybe he just wasn't being fair to her, maybe he really didn't understand everything about her. But he did know her well enough to see through that angry, raged, girl and into the bright, wonderful spirit she really was. He walked over and sat on the bed beside her. Arnold placed his arm around her shoulders. His intentions were still set on revenge, however.

Helga looked at him this way, he seemed so honest and true… but there was something in his eyes that told her not to trust him, not just yet. 

"How about we spend a day together? We could make a fresh start… and maybe even get to know each other a little better." Arnold suggested. The dense, petty Arnold still wished to complete the dare, to look big in the eyes of his friends… and Helga's enemies. 

"Sure, Football Head. When?"

"How about Wednesday, Helga? There's a teacher work day, and we could go to the pier… and the beach. Does that that sound okay?"

"Oookay… sure, Arnold." Helga could not help but still be skeptic to his comforts. Their was just… something, something in the way he was talking to her. She needed to find out if something was up with Arnold. She would consult her secret spy tomorrow. "I'll call you."

"Sounds cool." Arnold wondered if she could see through his fakeness, he wondered if he was succeeding. Even though he knew he would soon get what he wanted, he couldn't help but feel utterly guilty and dirty. "It was actually nice to hang around with you, Helga."

"Yeah, you too, Football Head. So Wednesday, then?" Helga wanted to know what this was about. Curiousity burned inside of her.

"Yeah, Wednesday it is." Arnold felt blank, empty… Much like a person feels after they have just commit a murder, or realized that life was centered on some vain attempt to look cool.

Helga left Arnold's house then, without so much as a hug. Oh, life is quite barren when your feelings are left unnoticed and unreturned.

A/N: Well, I thought this chapter kinda sucked. It was all I could think of on short notice. School for me is starting in just two days and yes, I am quite depressed and unhappy about it. That unhappiness was somehow transgressed into my fanfic. Go figure.


	4. I Know I Love You

Disclaimer's on first chapter! Please don't sue me, Mr. Big Bad Lawyer Man! ::cowers and rolls into a ball::

A/N: So it's been a LONG, LONG time since I've updated this and I am truly (well, kinda) sorry about it. I am now 14 as of November 22nd! Woohoo! Go me!! LOL Well, anyway… It's Christmas vacay right now and so I have lots of free time and no homework on my hands so I can probably finish this baby without making it sound dumb! Hehe! Well, hope you enjoy!

Marshmallows and Irony

Chapter Four:

Helga ran out of Arnold's boarding house angry, sad and confused. She threw her skateboard down on the ground, hopped on it and was gone into the night without Arnold's affections… without happiness… without a sweater to weather the cold, lonely night. 

__

I hate him, she thought. _I really, really hate him._

__

No you don't, a voice inside her said. _You know you love him… and maybe he loves you too. You can't give up. Not on love…_

As Helga struggled with her feelings on her way home, Arnold plotted in his room. He wondered with all his might how he could hate a girl so much… She made him feel like scum. Something burned inside of him because of her; he didn't know what it was. He wanted so much to destroy her, to tear her down cell by cell until their was nothing left of her but a soul… but he couldn't. He cared. He cared a whole hell of a lot, but he would never admit to himself how he knew he _really_ felt about Helga.

Like children, hours later… the two were laying on their beds later that night crying to themselves about their stupid, confused lives… Neither one knowing how to fix it all.

A few days passed and soon it was Tuesday afternoon, the day before their "date." The two had taken every measure to avoid each other at school, but eventually their attempts failed and they were paired together for an English project involving researching a poet of each pair's choice.

The groups were told to work on their projects for the rest of the class period. Helga and Arnold's desks were joined together at the front so they were facing each other, but their heads were down. They were both deep in thought, but not about the project. Helga and Arnold both had Edgar Allen Poe in consideration, of course, because of how shit they felt at the moment, so they didn't worry about their subject. They knew Mr. Poe's works could sympathize with them. After all, his life was even shittier than both of theirs.

Arnold knew he had to break the silence. "So… tomorrow at the pier, right?"

"Right… yeah…" Helga said, trying not to come back from deep-space thought.

The three o'clock bell rang and Helga rushed out the door and to her locker. Coincidently, Arnold's locker was close to Helga's so she knew they would inevitably have some sort of conversation.

As she gathered her books into her bag, she glanced up at Arnold only a mere seven feet from her, talking to Gerald. She tried to look away, but their talk intrigued her. 

"So tomorrow's the big day, huh?" Gerald asked and nudged Arnold in the side.

"Yeah… I guess." Arnold shrugged. "What the hell is so big about it?"

"The dare! You know what I'm talking about!"

"Quiet, Gerald! Do you want her to hear about it?" It was too late, Helga had heard. _How dare he do that to me??? A dare, _she thought. _I wonder what kind of dare…_

"So you're definitely going to get it done with at the pier??" Gerald asked again, trying to be sure of where and when he and the other guys would have to be with their camcorder.

Arnold stuffed a geography book in his bag. "Well I'm going to _try_."

Helga tried to sneak away from beside her locker as quickly as she could, but when she spun around, she crashed into Eugene, sending his books all over the hall and making him fall backwards onto the floor.

"I'm okay…" Eugene called and raised his hand weakly into the air from his position in the middle of the hall.

"Yeah, well watch were you're going, dumbass!" Helga yelled back angrily as she pushed her way through the high school crowd and out the exit.

A/N: Short chapter? Yeah… I know. I'm writing another right after I upload this, I could've run it all into one chapter, but I just wanted to keep you guys suspended for the time while your computer loads. Hehe Review if you like!


	5. Arnold Day Dreams

Disclaimer on first chapter!

A/N: So the next two chapters will be pretty short, my dad's limiting me to one and a half hours on the computer per day. What the fuck is up with that?? Jeez! So I wrote the following two last night in bed while listening to Rooney. I love Rooney so much! That's kind of why I'm into Princess Diaries fanfiction too… Robert Carmine… I could go on forever… BUT ONTO THE STORY!

Marshmallows and Irony

Chapter Five: Arnold Daydreams…

Arnold suddenly glanced toward the exit and saw Helga storming out.

__

Oh God… she knows, he thought as the whole thing hit him hard in his heart. _How could I have been such an asshole? _

__

Time seemed to stop as he saw Helga's head turn suddenly back in Arnold's direction. He knew it was a day dream, but he couldn't resist. Helga came walking back down the hall toward him in a bright burst of light, like an angel. She finally reached him and placed both of her hands on his shoulders.

"You know, Helga, don't you?…" he asked the angel surrounded in light.

"Of course I know, Football Head," came her heavenly voice. "But I love you anyway…"

Arnold stepped closer to the apparition and gazed into those deep blue eyes of hers… like tiny oceans… He began to draw nearer to her face and…

"ARNOLD!" Gerald yelled as he scrambled to get away from Arnold, who was about to kiss him flat on the mouth. "What the hell do you think you're _doing?!!" _Arnold snapped out of his day dream and he finally realized what he was doing. Even though nobody in the hall had really witnessed the event as they were too busy with their own high school lives, his face turned a bright, bright crimson.

"I… uh… Gotta go." Arnold said sheepishly as he started to dash to the exit. What's wrong with me? WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME??? "And I'm sorry about, uh… _that_, Gerald. I was thinking about… ummm, someone. Yeah, someone." Arnold said, turning a brief moment back to Gerald, but still walking quickly backward.

"Damn, I just hope it's a girl…" mumbled Gerald to himself as he closed his locker and clicked the combination lock back into place. "That's all _I've_ got to say about it."

A/N: Thanks to those of you who reviewed!!! I love you guys! _Mwah! Mwah!_


	6. Mr Fudgy Gets It

Disclaimer on first chapter!!!

A/N: Again, thanks to the reviewers! You guys kick ass!

Marshmallows and Irony

Chapter 6: Mr. Fudgy Gets It

On her way home, Helga had to stop in the park to take care of some business…

"Okay, Pink Boy," she yelled, grabbing Harold by his shirt. "What exactly do you know about a certain _dare_ that Arnold has to complete?…" She grabbed his shirt a bit tighter. "Concerning _me_…"

"I have no idea what you're talking about!" Harold said a bit shakily as he brushed Helga off of him with his Mr. Fudgy Bar. Despite the fact that Harold might have grown a bit more fashion sense since fourth grade, he was still incredibly, incredibly fat.

"I know for a FACT you do!" Helga said pointedly, although she didn't actually know shit about the whole camp out thing, she was just guessing. "Just tell me one thing…"

"Fine! _Fine… _What do you want to know?"

"What was the dare _for?… Specifically…_" She placed her hands on her hips and glared down at the fat kid sitting on the merry-go-round.

"I don't know," Harold said crossing his chubby arms and flinging his nose into the air like a stubborn, little kid. "But maybe a few bucks would refresh my memory…"

"Listen, _Har-old_… I am NOT giving you any fucking money!" she hissed at him as she grabbed the Mr. Fudgy and waved it high over Harold's head. "Just tell your dearest friend, Helga, what the dare was for… or Mr. Fudgy gets it!"

"Jesus Christ, Helga! The dare was to kiss you!" He reached feebly, still sitting sown, for the ice cream. "Now give me my Mr. Fudgy!!"

"Thanks, toots," Helga said as she casually tossed the Mr. Fudgy over her shoulder and into the sand surrounding the merry-go-round. "Your service is greatly appreciated." Helga turned her back to the now teary-eyed Harold kneeling over his Mr. Fudgy which was now covered in sand and walked away.

"THAT WAS MY LAST FIFTY CENTS!!!" Harold yelled, clawing into the sky. "_NOOOOO!!!!!"_

A/N: I'm really sorry that is was so short! I'm just not that much in the mood to write!… But I still want to make you guys happy so I'm going to continue with the story!

Oh, and thanks D. Zire-14, I think I'll use option #4. lol


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